Woo Hoo

35 pounds! The tourtise is winning the race! Those new clothes are going to look good on me in Brazil!

Switching from the carrot to the stick (don't like carrots anyway)

In my last post of March 14th, I complained about doing everything right and not losing weight.  I find that when I do the work correctly and I do not get the "A." I get discouraged and want to quit or emotionally eat to console the agony of defeat...

I had been stuck between 22-24 pounds lost for about two months and got sick of it.  I was eating fairly well, but some days were better than others.  I was also only getting to the gym 3-4 days per week.  I had been participating in a challenge at the gym to lose weight, but when I fell behind, the incentive for the $750 was not big enough to keep me going.

 Two weeks ago, I bought tickets for Brazil this summer at the end of June and I thought I had better do something to kick myself in the butt.  I am still working out with my trainer twice a week, but I needed more....  Since the carrot was not working, I went for the stick.  I decided to enlist the help of my trainer.  If I do not email him my food journal daily, it costs me $5.  Saturdays are my hardest day to get to the gym.... if I do not go it costs me $15.  That totals $50 per week. He gets to keep whatever he gets as a tip.  So far, I have made it two weeks without giving him a dime.  I am also down 5 pounds.  This challenge ends June 28.  I have 13 more pounds to go!

For the last two weeks I have made it to the gym 5 times a week and have written down every bite of food.  I find that with someone else reading my food journal, I am more likely not to put the food in my mouth.  I don't like being scolded.  I have also stood in the front row of a step class (2 time to go ever).  It was not pretty, but according to my heart rate monitor, it was a good workout.  I had another triumph.  I forgot my tennis shoes last Friday but did not give up on the workout... I had a swimsuit so I went to the pool. 

Last, I am wearing a suit today that I have not been in for two years.  YEAH!

Slow and steady can still win the race, right?

Where is my Wagon?

The horses ran off and the wagon came unhitched.  Could someone please rehitch them to my wagon?  Where is my wagon anyway?

So I fell off the "wagon" like so many times in my life.  I went more than a week without losing weight while working out and eating right, my daughter got sick, and I felt sick too (just one of the days in question).  Did I get on my bike at home? No.  Did I make it to the gym since Tuesday? No. (swimming lessons have fallen apart for my daughter)  Did I overeat? YES.  I have been so hungry.  I gave in to my hunger last Wednesday by eating a double portion of meat, many wheat thins (probably 3 servings), and 2 wafer cookies.  Now Thursday, I did well until dinner.  We went to a fundraiser and they were serving appetizers.  It was also a wine tasting.  I had two glasses of wine and an uncountable number of appetizers including dessert.  I felt so guilty for the next 2 days and my scale was up 3 pounds too.  I am not sure how some people follow those diets where you get one cheat day to eat all and anything you want which will supposedly keep your metabolism guessing.  I seriously have a problem stopping with just one bite of dessert if there is more dessert sitting in front of me.  I am better off just not taking that first bite or just making a small serving.  I do get the feeling though that I need to figure out some way to have a small amount of dessert at least a couple of nights a week.  I made chocolate covered strawberries last night. Yumm.  I only ate two like I was supposed to and it satisfied my sweet craving.

I need to cook more and plan my meals.  I am getting tired of eating the same things.  Although I have been eating out.  Eating out is not that great though, because I stick to salads.  Anyone have any great recipes to share and have you tried any more FR recipes? 

Today, I am getting back to the gym! Clothes are in the car.  Check on me to see if I went.  My weight is back down and I have lost another half pound so I have turned things around.... again.  I am down two sizes and it is nice to go shopping in my closet. 

Thanks for all your support, I need it.  I do not go it alone well and wish I had a gym buddy.

5k anyone?!!?

So I have to say that I have been pretty uninspired this past week and HUNGRY!  I have been eating about 200 more calories than I have been a day (half of a Lara bar before and after my workout).  I have hit a plateau ( i hate them), but I know they are happen and am waiting for it to pass. It has been 1 week and no weight loss.  My workouts with my trainer twice a week have been going great. He can make the sweat pour.  We have also been using the kettlebells a lot, which I like.

I did make an appointment to get my RMR and my VO2 max done in a couple of weeks but then a meeting was scheduled at the same time.  I will reschedule.  I also got my paperwork to get my blood work done.  I need to make sure that nothing is up on that front as well. 

Now for the fun part:
So yesterday I thought I would do my own treading class.  It consists of  5 min running, 5 min active recovery, 4 min running, 4 min active recovery.... you get the picture.  They were showing National Security? in the cardio theatre in the gym.  I was worried about getting to 5 because I have not run the two weeks since I have been home and I did not run longer than 5 minutes at FR.   So I started my run for 5 minutes at a 5.2... I got to 5 minutes and I thought I am doing ok, I should go for 7.... got to 7, I am doing ok, I should got for 10... got to 10... you get the picture. I RAN for 20 minutes before taking a 2 minute recovery and then I ran again.  I ran a 5k and only walked for 3.5 minutes!!!! YEAH!  As you can see from my blog pictures, I have run before.  I did not think I had the lungs for it anymore.  My friend Kamala and I were looking for a 30 day goal and we thought there was no way that a St Patrick 5k was possible. Well... I was wrong :)

Back Again

I am not sure how the people at FR find the energy to blog every night.  I did not.  I did try to workout after dinner and had to work some nights, so that may have been part of it.  I also got very frustrated and sore.  I had a very hard time keeping a positive attitude after gaining weight after the first week.  That did not mean that I still did not give it my all.  In the back of my mind, I had this hope that  a miracle would happen and my body would make up for all the weight I held onto the first week.  I found myself not being able to focus on my successes (did I ever say how competive I am).  I kicked some butt on the hikes after the first 5 days.  I was the only one that for both of my two weeks to choose the hardest hikes on Saturday, just for the extra calorie burn.  I also ran on the treadmill for the treading class between a 5.4 and 6.5.  I did some really cool releases with the kettlebells.  I took 5 personal training classes in addition to the regular schedule. 

I lost 2.5 pounds at FR in the two weeks I was there and .5 inches from my hips and waist (I think that was a gift from Ursula).  I expected to lose at least 10 pounds from my BodyBugg.

I am 1 day away from 2 months at this and I have lost 21.5 pounds,  yet I still have problems recognizing that sucess.  Not sure why I am so hard on myself, but not losing what I expected at FR really weighs heavy on my self esteem. I feel like I failed.  Why can't I pull out of that mindset?

I need to get to the gym.  I usually feel better when I do, and I missed two workouts.

Oh, for my 20 pound reward I purchased a new gym bag for myself. It is the size of the lockers, so no more stuffing my duffle bag into the locker :)

I called this morning to get my RMR  and VO2 max tested.  So I keep moving forward, even if it feels like I am moving through mud.  Not only am I competitive, but I am stubborn too.

A day turned difficult

I have to say the day started off well.  I made it to the gym at 6am to an extra workout before breakfast.  The Monday assessment hike went well and I was able to keep up.... except for a tweek that I felt in my quad when running down a hill. It felt like a cramp so I ignored it and kept going, massaging it as I went.   Well, it continued to get worse as the day went on.  I am not sure if I pulled or tore something... it just hurts.  I am taking the night off and icing it.  It is really getting me down mentally though.  I have been dealing mentally with not losing weight (actually gaining) here but now with the thought of not being able to do everything, just stinks.  Just in a funk I guess.  I hope tomorrow is better.

Great Intentions

When I arrived at FR, I had all of the great intentions to blog daily about my calorie burn, the great food, hikes, and classes.  Instead, I have done my best just to get a shower before going to bed.  Now my days are not exactly slow here because I have been adding personal training sessions, Nutrition Appts, Massage, and Counseling in addition to all the classes.  Oh and I can't forget I have had to work about 1:30 hours per day up until today.  I got so mad and tired about work on Wednesday, I started crying when someone said it looked like I was having a rough day. 

To give you an idea, I have been burning 3500 - 4000 calories per day according to my BodyBugg. Today will be the lowest because I missed the hike to go to the Urgent Care for my asthma.  I have been down this road before and I did not want to get too sick.  I could feel it settling in my chest.  So now I have prednisone and antibiotics.  Hopefully I will be much better by Monday.

Now for the toughest part of my day.  At the Urgent Care they wanted a weight.  I thought to myself "cool"  because I am a daily weigher and I like to know where I am at all times.  Well..... It read a 3 pound weight gain!   Now I know what you are thinking.  Different scale.  I was too, in order to calm myself down. So, when I got back to FR I tried to find Essara and when I could not find her, I found the scale.  It read 3 pounds up as well.  I wanted to throw the scale out of the glass window.  I was so upset. This is Friday!  Do you realize how hard I have been working out?  I also weighed in at 3:30pm on Sunday after traveling all day.  This weight was at 10am.
This SUCKS!  Not sure what the problem is but my body needs to go back to elementary school to learn simple subtraction! 

Now for the good part of the week (may write other highlights later):  I have had two sessions with Michael.  He is a trainer that teaches Russian style kettle bells.  I have learned all kinds of releases and flips that I never would have thought I could do.  Really cool!

Monday Hike

On the first day there is a evaluation hike.  Somehow I ended up on the Fast Van.  THAT IS NOT SUPPOSED TO HAPPENED ON YOUR FIRST WEEK.  These people that have been here for weeks are running on the trail.  Clumsy me FELL  about 5 minutes into the hike when I twisted my foot on a rock.  Micheal (one of the guides) stopped me or I would have kept going because I did not want to seem like a sissy.  Well I had bloodied my knee needing two band aids.  My knee did not hurt as bad as my foot. But of course I cannot show pain or else I will end up on the slow van! My heart rate got up to180 and my asthma kicks in.  We get to the van and I think "Whew" and the guide says we have more time! So we start on another trail.  I burned 2300 calories before LUNCH.  More later. Time for bed.

4 Ibuprofen Morning

I have so much to tell but no energy to do it! Love it here.  I am in the fastest hiking van on the first week but bringing up the rear on the hikes.  Food is wonderful. Exhausted.  Got my first blister today :(

No turning back now!

I am checked in, weighed in,  fed, unpacked, showered and oriented. Now all I have to do is sleep before the life changing experience begins.  Loved all the people I have met so far.

The day starts at 6am tomorrow with stretch class for an hour before breakfast and then off for a 2 hour hike.  Cross your fingers for no blisters!

I think I did pretty well today with food considering that I ran between planes and then went straight to the shuttle. 

Breakfast: two hard boiled eggs (do you know how hard that is to find in the airport)

Lunch: Banana and a Kellogg's peanut butter fiber bar (135 calories)

Snack: another banana

Dinner: Chicken and brown rice bowl with all kinds of veggies that I normally would not eat (429) and Tiramisu (127 calories)

The rooms are cute and clean.  I do not have a bathroom mate this week, so things are quiet.  Evidently I am in the rooms that the BL cast were in when they stayed on FR.

Exciting things AWAIT.

Packed and ready to go!

Well, my plane leaves early tomorrow morning.  After ready Diana's blog, I need to pack some jewelry. :)    I took the day off from the gym today to give my body some rest before I send it to WAR.    Got a pedicure and manicure today.  All I need to do is say a quick prayer before I weigh my bags!  So, excited, yet nervous at the same time.  I have never packed so many shoes for one trip.  Wish me luck! 

One Month Down

So, I had my pity party and now I am better, but I am sure it won't be the last.  I have to figure out how to not let the scale own me.  It can totally dictate my mood for the day.

It has been one month since I started this journey and I have lost 13 pounds.  I feel stronger in my sessions with my trainer and I have more stamina.  I am finishing up the last of my shopping before I leave and have about half of my packing done.  I am really anxious and nervous about the trip.  There is a lot to be done at work and home before I leave.  I hope to learn a lot about myself there.

Maybe by time I get back from FR, the towels at the gym will fit around me?  Wishful thinking, huh?

Nervous, Sore, and Frustrated

Well, I made it to the gym 5 days this week.  I am being extremely good with what I eat and the scale only budged another .2 pounds (yes, less than a quarter of a pound) to 10.8.  I am so sore that it is affecting my sleep.  I have started icing my ankle and I am using the foam roller daily at the gym on my gluts and IT bands. My shoulder hurts as well.   HOW in the world am I going to make it through 7 hours a day if I am having trouble making through ONE!

Thought the scale was broken!

So, I went 6 (yes SIX) days with the scale reading the same 9 pound weight loss. Ok, so I admit that I am one of those people that weigh daily.  I think I would need a time vault to stop.  :)  This morning I finally hit 10.4 pound lost!  Boy that was painful!  I have the hardest time passing up those Costco food demos, bread at restaurants (much less all white carbs), and even bite size desserts, but I did and the scale was not moving. Alas, it finally moved!

Guess what is next for me is to write down what I eat.  I just can't seem to do it.  I have not found a simple enough method that is not too time consuming.  Suggestions? 

My goal for the week is 5 days to the gym.  Two down 3 to go!

Bodyvive

I made it to my first group class today.  I joined the 12 week challenge class at the gym and they have classes just for the challenged, I mean  the challengers.  Since we were mostly newbies in the class I did not feel self conscious that I could not get all the moves.  They have a different class every Saturday.  I think I will try more. 

I am meeting with my trainer two times per week and getting to the gym two other times.  I still do not think I am going to be ready for the "resort."  I am getting nervous since I am only working out 1 hour 4 days per week and I am going to jump to 7 hours per day.  How is my body going to handle that?  I am already really sore some days just after an hour.

As you see,  I posted to pictures to show you some of the high and low points in my life.  This is not all of them by any means.  This was just post digital camera purchase and when I was not taking the pictures.  I will look for more.  I am being brutally honest to serve as a reminder on this journey, but also another effort reach out for help.

Work out progress

So you may wonder why January 2 was my Monday?  For those of you that don't know me, I work in the accounting world and December 31st is my year end.  I am not one of those New Years Resolution people, but I had trouble taking on the challenge of getting to gym when I was working extra hours to close the company books.   I actually have been talking about going to a fitness resort for the past two years, but actually working out the time away from work and my parents to take care of my daughter is another story.

Since January 2nd, I have lost 7.8lbs.  I am past the dreaded week two and am not as hungry so it should get easier.  Only 5 million more pounds to go.  :)  When I get to 10 pounds lost, I am getting myself a treat... a pair of these (Wolford Tights!).  I need incremental goals and rewards :)

Three weeks until FR Malibu

Well, I have never had a blog before but I have been inspired by reading on the FR site. I thought I would start a blog to give myself some accountability and give you some background about me.

I have come to the realization that I would better off if I could just cut food out of life all together.  I have counted at least 6 times in the past 15 years where I have lost 30 to 70 pounds.  I have started diets countless more times than that and not made it past the 10 pound mark. I find it hard to get past the second week plateau.  I have clothes in my closet from a size 6 to size 16 (I donated the 18 and 20 when I lost the 70 lbs).  I am now back at size 16 and am determine not to buy anymore clothes.

I know how to diet, exercise and can lose the weight when I set my mind to it.  I lost 70 pounds in 5 months.  I just can't maintain.  I can restrict in order to lose the weight (cut out all white carbs, no deserts, etc) but I have trouble finding balance once I reach my goal.  To make matters worse, when anything stressful happens in my life, I find comfort in food.  I also find excuses not to make it to the gym.  I don't go and eat a bag of cookies, but I might eat a cup of ice cream per night and have second portions at dinner. 

I have always dieted on my own and I am hoping to look to others this time for support.  I need to figure this out.  I need help.  Something has to give.  I am tired of starting over.  I am hoping to find some answers at FR.

My Monday was January 2.